Sri vidya for gay people?

arpit

Shri matre namah 🙏🏼

I began as a devotee of maa kali. But she has taken me towards maa Lalita and now i have desire to get initiated into both kali kula and sri vidya. I understand that all the attributes we assign to ourselves are superficial and atma is formless, genderless. All attachments are only in our mind and we are only constantly trying to overcome it through various means.

But my body is attracted to men and i am afraid of approaching guruji for deeksha. I fear rejection. I have a partner of many years. I also think that all the love and sexual feelings we have are also a form of maa, just like anger and other feelings. Still, i am afraid. I don’t wanna get married to a woman or have any kids. I also sometimes feel that i have no gender and i am all genders. But I am scared that guruji may reject me for this reason. I am a doctor by profession and i want to also continue in this profession for now and don’t want to take Sanyaas.

can someone please guide me?

nilasara

It's not Sannyas that you are taking. Also, diksha as in "purnadisksha" is something that comes later. Here you will not find judgement. You will begin like everyone else, at the beginning, with the beginner's courses. Do some searching around the site. Nobody here cares if you're gay.

If a guru or their followers gives you grief, then move on to someone who has a larger picture.

arpit

nilasara

Thank you for your response

nilasara

Devipuram is the best. The free beginner's courses teach you how to approach spirituality in a practical way, and own it. You get mantra permissions. The first mantras come from Annapurnambaji, wife of Swami Amritananda, live, through Zoom.

Swami Amritananda was a genius, and he has a collection of valuable meditation techniques. They are for you. Many people now are taking so-called Sri Vidya, and paying for it. Then they are getting a piece here, a piece there, but never the whole picture.

From the free beginner's classes you will get so many advanced means for developing yourself, and working with the devata. I belong to some highly esoteric Sri Vidya groups because I just like to hear people talk about the Goddess. But most of these groups follow no path and the people are just as bewildered as the common ignorant, or more so because they are dazzled by the brilliance of teachers who have years of study of advanced esoterica. Yet those teachers cannot transmit the knowledge.

Swami Amrita didn't have that problem. His path is modelled on Parasurama's Kalpa Sutras. And includes all the necessary aspects of worship, without getting everybody hung up on esoterica, and without demanding payments.

Start with the Saraswati Vac pdf. Which gives a lovely Saraswati mantra, and the AliKali mantra. This gets one ready for Satchakra japa (japa on the chakra petals), done later.

Then apply for the beginner's course. Sometimes it takes a month or two for them to start. Right now Rama Amma one of Amrita's daughters is on tour through the USA and UK. Maybe Radha (another daughter) is still conducting the beginner's courses. But maybe she isn't. Thus maybe they wll be a couple months untl the next ones.

Nonetheless, you are given two pdfs with a number of practices: viraj Homam, Kundalini meditation, Saraswati Vac mantra, and more.

In beginning courses you will learn tarpanam, puja, satchakra japa, and how to work with the three base chakras andtheir deities. You will learn the short Devi shloka and also how to move the attention during japa, which is something no other guru I have heard of does. You will work with devata Mahaganapati, Bala Tripurasundari, and Chandi.

I hope you partake. Jai Gurus Amrita and Annapurnambaji

arpit

nilasara

Thank you for your elaboration and motivation.

AbbyShakti

I took the beginner's course 5 years ago. At the time it was taught by both Amma Rama and Amma Radha. I am trans by the way. Not only was it no big deal, but I personally, felt treated in a very warm and affirming way. I think you will find what you are looking for with the beginner's course and Devipuram.

arpit

AbbyShakti

Okay. Thank you for your response. 🙏🏼